I created you... I can destroy you.

It's been so much time and so much has transpired, I think I'll just tell you some of the things that haven't happened because if you care to know about anything that has happened, you probably already do.

I haven't gotten my car back yet. Apparently it's going to be sometime this week though, which makes me more happy than you can probably imagine - even if your one of those prodigious "children of the inner eye" (as I like to call you) who are gifted with such an ingenious wit and stellar imagination that you can convincingly lie your way out of anything... which I can sort of do, but not really, because the excuses I make up are a little bit too mundane.

I haven't gained any more acception in my group of friends, probably due to the fact that I really haven't gotten any happier in the past week, which is due to the fact that I haven't lost any weight, done any work (by work I mean reading or writing for "pleasure", which is really more like saying "pre-work" in my case because I would like, as you know, to be a writer someday), or, while we're on the topic, applied for any jobs. I have looked at jobs, pretended to read, and thought about losing weight, but if you know anything about me you should know that I haven't yet become the kind of person who can translate thought into action.

I didn't pay of my steadily increasing credit card bill (in fairness though, the stuff I've rung up on it has been tuition and books, so... it's noble............................ keep pretending..................

........

are they gone?

.........

okay.)

I haven't managed to figure out what's wrong with the internet (it keeps stopping and starting at the whim of some third party I have not yet discovered) although I HAVE discovered that it's not my computer's fault, as I formatted its little hardrive - which I have not dusted in years - last night.

I did not keep Gayla, the lady bug that landed on my shirt and then lived on my desk at work over the weekend unbeknownst to me until I discovered her this morning as I was listening to my boss be grumpy. I also do not know whether or not she is still on the bush that I put her on, but she did teach me that ladybugs drink diet Coke, which is edifying.

The semi-self-inflicted wound on my head has not yet healed, although it is coming along quite nicely, as I did not find any blood and/or other residue from it's grotesqueness on my pillow last night.

Katie did not like "Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind" as much as I thought and hoped she would. It is quite a shame as well as a blow to my ego, so out of self-preservation I will not ever tell her about a single movie that I enjoy ever again - unless she asks.

I did not go immediately after my (minor) surgery and have two beers in order to finish the Oktoberfest Mini Beer Tour at Old Chicago. Nope. Didn't do that. Never. Nuh-uh.

Adam didn't post to our political debate blog, and yet despite my great urge, I didn't delete it - pissed off as I am. I didn't call him to tell him that I was and still am pissed. Needless to say, the one person in media he emulates is that smarmy bastard, Bill O'Reilly. Did you know that he has a children's book? A CHILDREN'S BOOK! What next? Mein Kampf for Tweens?

Enough brainwashing. Please watch the following television programs with regularity, as I feel they might enrich your lives*:

Desparate Houswives (ABC, Sun 9/8 central)
Surreal Life (VH1, Sun 10/9 central)
Scrubs (NBC, Tues 9:30/8:30 central)
Lost (ABC, Wed 9/8 central)


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*NOTE: please feel no real obligation to watch these shows... I will love you (or at least "like-like" you) as a friend whether you watch them or not. Also, I wasn't too sure on some of the times - check your local listings for verification.