FRUSTRATION: a dramatic recreation of a conversation with a piece of shit.

(Internal thoughts will be presented like this.)
(STAGE DIRECTIONS WILL BE PRESENTED LIKE THIS.)

ME: (STRUGGLING TO READ A VIRGINIA WOOLF NOVEL BEFORE TOMORROW (TODAY) WHEN THE DOOR OPENS; JOE HAS RETURNED HOME FROM BOWLING, AND HE HAS COME BEARING A FRIEND WHO APPROACHES MY ROOM.)

HIM: (THROUGH THE DOOR) Michael Trenary...

ME: (Oh Jesus Christ... just go out and get drunk already.) Yeah?

HIM: (KNOCKS ON THE DOOR LIGHTLY WITH WHAT I IMAGINE TO BE A KNUCKLE)

ME: (Does 'Yeah' still mean 'Come in'?) Come in!

HIM: Can I come in?

ME: (Retard.) Yeah.

HIM: (OPENS THE DOOR; STANDS THERE, STARING AROUND AT ALL PARTS OF MY ROOM WHICH IS QUITE A MESS AT THE MOMENT. SEES GRADUATION ANNOUNCEMENTS.) Are you graduating?

ME: (We've established this, asshole.) Yes.

HIM: What are you going to do afterwords... live out the rest of your days in Olathe?

ME: (Fuck you.) No, at least I hope not... but I'll be there for a little while probably.

HIM: You could get an apartment and live the Johnson County dream life...

ME: (Fuck you.) Right.

HIM: (STANDS THERE)

ME: (PRETENDS TO READ) You guys going out?

HIM: We're just going across the street (POINTS, BECAUSE HE THINKS I DON'T KNOW WHERE 'ACROSS THE STREET' IS) Want to come?

ME: No, thanks. I've got to read this.

HIM: You never go out.

ME: (Correction: I never go out with you.) I go out sometimes, just not often, and usually not when I have work and class the next morning.

HIM: See, I told you the bars weren't all that... you thought before you were 21 that it was this amazing place... and I told you it wasn't a big deal.

ME: (What you don't understand, asshole, is that it wasn't that I wanted to go to the bars, it's that I wanted to hang out with my friends but didn't even have the option to because they always went to the bars -- the one place I couldn't go. Since you, however, have no friends outside of a bunch of people who no one's ever met and my roommate (which is still a mystery to me,) I can see how you wouldn't understand.) I never thought they were some amazing place...

HIM: Yeah, you did. You always were pissed off because you couldn't go there.

ME: Whatever, I'm not going to try to explain something you wouldn't even understand.

HIM: Why wouldn't I understand?

ME: You just wouldn't.

HIM: I understand that all you like to do is sit at home and play board games.

ME: (How often do I fucking play board games?! You are a fucking piece of shit who sits at home with your windows blacked out so you don't ever have to see the sun and makes stupid trashy websites all day. Fuck you.) Yeah, Dave, you're exactly right, because that's all I ever do is play board games.

HIM: (STANDS THERE STARING)

ME: (STARES FIXEDLY AT BOOK)

JOE: (FROM THE LIVING ROOM) C'mon, Dave, he's got a lot of reading to do.

HIM: Yeah, the library is waiting.

ME: Fuck you. (UNFORTUNATELY HE EITHER DOESN'T HEAR ME OR DOESN'T CARE TO RESPOND.)